Sue Woolfe

Good Eats

Don’t Date Old Flames

by on Dec.12, 2012, under Friends, Good Eats, Life

So this guy that I knew back in high school is married and all that happy horse shit, and I saw him and his wife at the 10 year high school reunion. But we aren’t really friends, even though Facebook says so. Know what I mean?

So out of the blue, this guy sends me a private message on Facebook and says that he is coming to town for a big business meeting and he wants to know if I can go out to dinner with him while he’s in town. So I think, why the hell not? I didn’t even ask if his wife was coming with in – it didn’t matter to me if she was coming or not. I figured he just wanted someone to have dinner with so he could take a break away from all the business people he was cooped up with all day at his big meetings.

Well, big mistake. His wife was not on the trip and he was on the company dime, so we went to a nice restaurant and he got drunk really fast. And then the fucker starts hitting on me, saying shit like how much he’s missed me since the good old days back in high school How he always regretted not staying in touch and he never should have gotten married to his wife, they were too young, they’ve changed, she doesn’t understand him, yadda yadda yadda.

I have to tell you, this was not a fun night. I got better things to do than watch an old fat man getting drunk and blubbering about how unhappy he is with his wife. Fuck that. I put his drunk ass into a taxi and sent him back to the hotel and got the hell out of there.

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Is Everyone Having Turkey Tomorrow?

by on Nov.21, 2012, under Good Eats, Life

Unless you are living under a rock or not here in the United States, you know that tomorrow is Thanksgiving and that most of us celebrate the day with a big family dinner that features a roasted turkey, dressing, mashed potatoes, and pies for dessert. We carry on this tradition every year to recognize the sacrifices made by our founding fathers and mothers and the hard life they endured while they tried to steal land from the native indians and find a way to grow shit and hunt so that the villagers didn’t starve to death every winter.

I’m not a big fan of history and I’m sure my teacher would be appalled at how I just described Thanksgiving, but I don’t give a fuck. That’s the hard truth and you can dress it up with stories about making friends with indians and shit, but the truth is that white people came to America on ships and started stealing shit from the people who already lived here.

Anyway, I have turkey on my mind. My mom was a big fan of turkey dinners and all the traditional side dishes. She liked to make this green bean casserole that had green beans, mushroom soup and fried onion rings on top. I don’t know what makes that green bean dish so important at Thanksgiving, but it’s a big deal down south. And the proper southern moms will trot that same green bean dish out again for the traditional Christmas dinner, too.

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Frosty Pumpkins This Week

by on Oct.05, 2012, under Fun Stuff, Good Eats, Life

No one in my neighborhood has put out a pumpkin on their porch yet, but I’m ready for one! The weather has cooled off a lot and I think a pumpkin this week would have no problem lasting until Halloween. The cool air is like a refrigerator and will keep it from spoiling.

I found a few pumpkins at Kroger yesterday, but they want $9 a piece and there were not very many to choose from. I don’t know why, but I have this deep feeling that a pumpkin should only cost about $4 or $5 – not $9 . So I guess I will look for a roadside stand or a charity pumpkin patch if I’m going to be spending $10 for this year’s pumpkin. I think the Boy Scouts or a church youth group could use that money a little better than the Kroger company.

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Empty Pringles Cans

by on Sep.20, 2012, under Good Eats, Life

The price of regular potato chips has gone up so much that the little bit you get in a bag full of air is outrageous. So I’ve stopped buying big bags of chips and picking up several cans of Pringles when they go on sale at the grocery store.

The Pringles can is always full and there is none of that bullshit excuse about why is the bag 3/4 empty because of “settling” during shipping. The potato chip bags are not clear – they are completely coated on purpose – so you cannot see how few chips are actually in the bag until after you’ve bought them and taken them home.

One thing that worries me is the empty Pringles cans seem like such a waste to throw them away. I wish I could think of something creative or useful to do with the cans. If you have any idea,s let me know. I go through at least 2 cans every week – they add up quickly.

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Wild Kittens

by on Sep.10, 2012, under Good Eats, Health, Life

About two weeks ago this cute little black cat showed up at my back door. I don’t usually see many cats in this neighborhood, and I have two dogs that bark a lot, so I was surprised to see it. It started coming around every night, so I started tossing some food out on the back stoop for it. I don’t really like putting food outside because I don’t want to attract raccoons or skunks, but I only put out a little at night and it was gone pretty quick.

Well, today I got a big surprise when I stepped outside to toss a few scraps from dinner. The black cat was there and so were three tiny little kittens. Oh, joy – more mouths to feed. So I went back in the house and popped open a can of tuna fish so the kittens could have some high protein food that is easy to eat and easy to digest.

I guess that since I started feeding the cat I need to buy some actual cat food at the grocery store next time I go shopping. I have a few cans of tuna on the shelf, but kittens need proper food to develop and tuna isn’t really enough vitamins and minerals for proper nutrition.

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